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Carolyn Cole, LCPC, LMFT, NCC

Carolyn Cole, LCPC, LMFT, NCC

Psychotherapist | Speaker | Writer

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    Month: August 2015

    The relationship we have with ourselves is the most important relationship we have…

    I once read a quote that said the most important relationship we have in our lives is with ourselves.  That really stood out to me as I… Read more “The relationship we have with ourselves is the most important relationship we have…”

    August 1, 2015September 5, 2021 by Carolyn Cole, LCPC, LMFT, NCC

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    Understanding your attachment style - and your partner’s - can be a literal game changer in relationships. Perspective shifts don’t always happen because the situation changes. Sometimes they happen because you do. ❤️ Listening is often talked about as a communication skill, but it is also a relational experience. Many people are used to conversations where someone quickly gives advice, changes the subject, interrupts, reassures, problem solves, or prepares a response. And while those responses are often well intentioned, sometimes what a person needs first is to feel heard, emotionally understood, and genuinely present with. Change and accomplishment doesn’t start with motivation. It starts with one small, repeated choice that begins to shift what you believe is possible. Not everything that feels like “passion” is actually supportive. And not everything that feels “calm” is true emotional safety. Self-discovery isn’t about becoming someone new. Feeling disconnected doesn’t always mean something is wrong.Sometimes it just means you haven’t been in each other’s inner world lately. It’s not really about the dishes….Or the text….Or the plans. Our nervous systems are constantly responding to stress, safety, and experience.

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